Our NYC Mayor Bloomberg has decided that we eat too much salt. Our Dear Leader has our best interests at heart and is mandating a nationwide movement for restaurants and food processors to cut the amount of salt they use by half regardless of the conflicting scientific information currently available.
That distant knocking sound you hear is my head beating on the wall. Foie gras, trans fats, a proposed tax on soda and now it is salt's turn to be caught in the cross hairs. We are talking about half-baked, poorly researched concepts that mutate into being accepted truths. I get it, the government wants us to eat well so that we won’t get sick and then we won’t notice that we don’t have any health care. Thank you very much but leave my salt alone. I have visions of clothing designers installing secret salt pockets into the cuff of a shirt, you look like you are passing your hand over the French fries, but you are actually salting them perfectly.
I once toured the inner sanctum of the DeCecco pasta factory in Abruzzo, Italy and was flabbergasted to learn that pasta that is imported into the United States must be vitamin enriched with niacin, ferrous lactate, thiamine mononitrate, riboflavin and folic acid. Being a confirmed cynic, I assumed the legislation was passed due to the efforts of The Niacin and Ferrous Lactate Lobby, but now I’m more concerned about where does DeCecco get that stuff and couldn’t I have just have my pasta with wheat and water like everyone else in Italy? I’ll throw caution to the wind and take my chances with riboflavin deprivation.
We always joke that the word “Umbria” translates as “land of meat and salt”. They like their food SALTY and it takes some getting used to, but generally speaking the Umbrians aren’t obese, they have a higher life expectancy than someone in the US and they actually seem pretty happy with their food.
I think Dear Leader Bloomberg has gone too far and I’m drawing a line in the salt. Leave my salt alone and go work on some other stuff to get the city back on its feet.